Deadly Silence!!!

She looked at him, her sad eyes unable to hide the pain of him not responding to anything.
Days had stretched into weeks now; there had been no change in his situation. Nothing seemed to be working, neither the medicines nor the prayers. There were talks around her to replace him, how she wondered it was possible to sever someone from one’s life so easily, just because they can’t serve you anymore.


Slowly she tried to get acquainted to his replacement; but his loyal services over the years still seemed to haunt her. She hoped against hope that his heart would beat again. For the past few days, he had been just lying like a vegetable. She willed her folks to adhere by her decision to keep him alive for a few more days, even if it was through life support. She wanted him to have one last chance.






So my mother keeps on hoping for our dead landline phone to wake up since the past 15 days. Slowly getting accustomed to the cell phone, which she had resented with the intensity of Taliban fighting the US forces. Addicted to the tele phone, she used to chide me .. but the tables just turned ;) Now just one small beep from our friend the telephone will be the best music we have heard in years !!!!!

PS: And pray why is the telephone a “he”.. you may ask? Because it only listens what you got to say and throws it out through its other ear (literally), and never says anything in return!!!!!!!!!!! :D (ok now I can see the male brigade baying for my blood and my sistahs nodding their head vigorously in agreement ;) )

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Time to move on!!

She watched the sun go down. There was something powerful about this sunset. It only seemed to make her resolve stronger.
There had been several times when she had made this decision but something seemed to hold her back, some unknown force. She was being drawn into a different world, a world which existed only in her dreams, a fact she refused to accept. The smile she carried with her hid her insecurities from the world too. Nobody seemed to spot the cracks in the smile.

This year had been a year of hanging onto a past which refused to die down. Of dreaming up things, which would never come true. The last day of this year seemed to jolt her out or her reverie. She knew time was running out, decisions needed to be made. She had to move on. Moving on, two little world which have far reaching effects. The scars which would come back to hurt her in the unlikeliest moments. The mistakes that make a habit to haunt her and the sorrow of an unfulfilled dream that she would carry with her.

Rome wasn’t built in a day… goes the popular saying and nor do lives change in day. But one day at a time tiny changes creep in and in a year’s time we are not the same anymore.


Happy new year to all of you!!!


The past year has been good, bad and ugly for me and I just hope I can shed the ugly burden and move on to 2009. Just an attempt to leave the hurt here and move on!!!!!

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Do you believe in Miracles??

Two pairs of eyes sat staring at the screen. Taking in each piece of information thrown at them. Each time hoping to find what they were looking for; a face in crowd.

Their faces often clouded with disappointment and self doubt. Was this going to be another futile goose chase? They looked at her with anticipation, hoping that she would give them support in their time of need, but to no avail. But they were not ready to give up yet, after all life was about hoping. Their dream would come true, he would definitely come into their lives and everything would be alright again. All the questions of their prying neighbors would be definitely put to rest. They believed in miracles.



This is precisely the feeling I get each time I see my parents scout the matrimony sites for me!!! They keep hoping for a miracle... ;)

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Snobbery…

She could hear their muted whispers as she walked past them. How much she had changed over a matter of few days. Today she didn’t even bother to turn and smile at them, they said. Yet she continued walking, looking straight ahead.

Snob; that was the word they had used. It had hurt her too much. They hadn’t bothered to check with her about her misery. They had just drawn their conclusions. She didn’t bother to correct them, she believed in keeping her woes to herself. This too shall pass she knew, time would reveal the truth to all!!





Only if the people around her had realized that the new found snobbery was thanks to a real stiff neck developed over the weekend!!!

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Of Ironies and Iron men!!

He hurried to get dressed for work; he was running late which was unlike him. His roommates had already left and the room looked like it had been hit by a hurricane. He smiled as he remembered how they had teased each other over girlfriends and crushes at the club last evening.
He blushed as he stuffed his wallet, she did look pretty in that but he knew that smile would turn to a scowl if he forgot her birthday next month.

As the bus sped down the road, his colleagues talked about their plans for the upcoming holiday. He had planned to catch with the many movies he had missed. Slowly as they neared their destination, all talk in the bus turned to work. They focused on the day ahead.

The bus screeched to a halt, his day had begun. Then it was a just a non stop flurry of activity. By the look of it, it already seemed a long say in office.

Little did he know it would also be his last!!

A small tribute to all the brave men in uniform who walk into danger knowing what awaits them. Who have their dreams and aspirations at the back of their minds but give it all up for people they don’t know, but just know the fact that they are their country men, irrespective of the region they belonged to.

Tears will be shed, peace marches held, but that birthday card will always remain not sent!!

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Kaleidoscope

"The road of life twists and turns and no two directions are ever the same. Yet our lessons come from the journey, not the destination.".. Don williams Jr

I had been planning a vacation since quite some time. Finally I decided to pack my bags and leave to my home state , God's own country.....So come join me as I take you with me on our escapades...

There is a rule while going on vacation, you are not fully packed and done till you have actually boarded your train. The same goes with me too, last minute scrambling and rushing to stores for all the essentials , and still when I unpacked and looked for stuff, many of it had mysteriously disappeared.
We had booked tickets to Kerala by train, a long 32 hour journey. However we were in for a hearty surprise, the Indian railways keeping our drudgery in mind, had upgraded our train to make it a “Nature trail /Eco tourism” special. The main attractions were the mighty cokroaches. We had a field day observing their behavior in extremely cold (read AC) conditions. Few of my co-passengers though were more interested in the rat family nearby and their hourly squabbles over the fact that the cockroaches were stealing the thunder!! (Yeah, they have ego-trips too!!)

The first week whizzed past in a whirlwind of weddings and temple visits. The divinity being a little exasperated with me after a while though. I visited around more than half a dozen of them in a day and they were fed up with the same conversations I had with all of them (You see they had no variety to chit chat over high tea that day except me!!). The elderly relatives fed me till I had food coming out of my ears…complaining “You have lost weight.” (Yay so my weight concealing outfits were working… I rejoiced!!).

Then there was the dreaded M word (marriage for the uninitiated). From birds and bees to the tallest coconut trees, all wondered aloud why “good luck” was eluding me. The only end result of all this being a new “Zen –like” expression on my face and more temple visits!!

The next leg of the journey was a fun filled week of back packing across southern part of Kerala with a few friends. It was a slightly unplanned trip; we had just the places we wanted to visit in mind ….a la Anthony Bourdain… No Reservations!!

The first place we went to was the majestic Padmanabhapuram Palace. The beautiful sculptures and wood work had us spellbound. The palace is breathtakingly beautiful and well maintained. We had our funny moments though … when my friend innocently asked one unsuspecting guide .. “But why didn’t Marthanda Varma, the king get married? Wasn’t he an eligible bachelor?” The look on the guide’s face was priceless and the rest of us were almost ROTFL. (psst we did have some cheeky answers from another friend for above question …but since this a family blog… ;) )
Kovalam beach was a major disappointment though .And what do I say about the Veli tourist village .. the sculptures or whatever you can call them were just best left to wild imagination …

We left for Alleppey the next day. With no train tickets, and me being a first time back packer, I was shivering when the ticket collector asked us to get down at the next station. I am sure he wanted to throw us out, but looking at the mountains we were carrying in the name of luggage he didn’t bother to test his muscle strength. So we were stranded in no man’s land in Varkala for a while, with the locals eyeing us with looks they only reserved for aliens.
We stayed at a wonderful home stay option at Alleppey. The hosts provided us with a cosy room in their house and lovely meals. Trust me, the way we were devouring food, I am sure they would do a background check the next time around… “Starvation victims will not be entertained!!”
The backwater cruise in the lovely houseboat however made up for all the missed trains and crowded buses. It was like a trip to another world, a journey we all will never forget in a long time to come.

The next stop was at Kottayam. The plan was to visit the Kumarakom Bird sanctuary. Visit it we did, but the birds seemed to have gone on a wedding reception or a party, leaving behind just a few hens and crows. I am sure they didn’t get our letter announcing our arrival, else this wouldn’t have happened.

Our final pit stop was at Cochin, rather near Cochin, in a quaint city called Thripunithura. My pal A and his parents were our hosts. Hosts would be a rather formal way to put it, the reception they gave us was like family, though we were meeting them for the first time... It was like an instant connection, like we had shared some bond long ago. We visited the Thripunithura royal family at the Hill Palace and went on a wonderful ferry ride across all the islands in Cochin. We had so much fun, with the jokes aunty cracked, for in future whenever I hear the word “Adulteration” I will think of her.( ok that’s an inner circle joke.. cant explain). As I waved them good bye, I felt I was leaving my folks behind. :)

As our train chugged out of Ernakulam Town station towards Pune and we waved out to A, I suddenly felt something was about to change... and it has indeed.. for better or for worse!!
I had one of the best trips ever. Made lasting friendships, one tiny grouse though being a miffed friend .. still wondering what went wrong in a matter of 12 hours.. I wish I knew... :(

As this post is on a journey, can baggage be far behind, considering we had loads of it . I’ll end this with a quote I read in Anita Nair’s book “Mistress”

“Baggage I suppose .. he said softly. None of us is free of it, and yet if we were, we wouldn’t be who we are”


P.S: Two learning’s from the trip:
1) It is not necessary to just own a camera.. You should know to use it too!!! (Yeah all my pictures look like they have been shot by a 3 year old)

2) Malayalis are very disciplined people, don’t believe me … ok then check the disciplined queues at the Beverages Corporation outlets.. even army drills will be put to shame.

Acknowledgement : I thank "god" for the first pic ;) in the post

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Path to Redemption!!

She looked forlorn…. There was no reply even today. In the past she had brushed off his lack of response to being busy and distracted by truck loads of work. Her patience seemed to be wavering now and she had no idea whom to turn to.

Strange thoughts seem to pass through her head. Where had things gone wrong she wondered? Everything had seemed so hunky dory in the past... at least most of the time.
Everyone around her seemed so happy, what had she done wrong that things had taken such a grim turn.

So many mails had gone unanswered, so many conversations turning into monologues… She slowly nodded her head, picking herself to face another day in isolation. To be ignored, she thought is not a very nice place to be in!!



Why was God not returning her mails???
Had God really created a rule that sent all her mails to a special folder called “Trash”in his MS outlook … (the bane of being born in a tech savvy generation she rued …atleast there were no firewalls and rules at heaven.com earlier ;)!!)
But as these thoughts flitted through her head, she sat down to write God her next mail…
For she believed.. “Hope Is a Good Thing, Maybe the Best of Things, and No Good Thing Ever Dies. (Shawshank Redemption)

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