Mindspace

Looking back

2010-05-13T13:31:00.005+05:30

Looking back I see a little girl with stars in her eyes,
Her canvas was the universe and her dreams sky high.

She dreamed of a being a good student and doing well in sports,
To see her parents eyes proudly shine when they saw her school reports.

She struggled with the needle and thread,
Skills they told her in future would hold her in good stead.

She breezed through her school days, college was a struggle,
Diodes, amplifiers capacitors and transistors made her mind boggle.

She stumbled into the big bad world and was labeled an employee,
Hoping the bugs she dug out for a living didn’t push her into ennui.

There came many downs, and a few ups too,
While destiny played its peek a boo, the knight showed up too.

Somewhere she is still the little girl with stars in her eyes,
Her canvas is still the universe just that a few dreams have died!!

As we herald the New Year!!

2010-04-15T00:00:00.002+05:30

The bright yellow flowers, the lighted lamps, the fruits and the coconuts, the anointed deities and a bleary eyed girl trying to take up all these sights are my first memories of Vishu.

The new clothes, the anticipation of the kaineettam and the sadhya ,Vishu is numero uno in my list of festivals.

As kids, Vishu was the only time our coffers would be full. I belong to a real big family , so that meant my coffers would be overflowing. Once the cash came in, there were many schemes ( read parents) offered to protect it. If one fell prey to these, it would be like one of those Nigerian money scams , you could bid the money good bye.

The loot would be usually invested very wisely in books ( in my case), cricket bats, posters of Sachin Tendulkar , WWF trump cards (in the Sibling’s case). The remaining would be stored to judiciously be used over the year as contingency fund ( if only I had planned my expenses so well once I started earning .. if only!!)

Once I started earning, it became a matter of give and take. So like my bank balance, no gain!! But more than the amount we get, it’s that childish joy of being indulged that cannot be replaced, however older you get.

Even though I have never been to Kerala for Onam or Vishu, my folks and extended family have always celebrated our festivals with more fervor here than my cousins back in Kerala … there is always that zeal to keep up your traditions once u are away from it.

My new resolution is to be more self reliant.. I have this vice of being overly dependent on people which I want to overcome.. What about you folks??

Hope this year blossoms for you with all the colors of spring … Vishu Ashamsakal

Grey matter …

2010-04-13T16:34:00.001+05:30

All of us have some activity which we use to empower and increase our grey matter. Some of solve complex mathematical problems, others read all the technical articles. Few solve crosswords and Sudoku , others just play around with all the gadgets available.

I have one too, it’s an easy method, and with almost zero percent chances of failure … I worry!!!

When I was younger, I worried about few things like completing my needle work and embroidery. These subjects were supposed to help us graduate from young girls to fine groomed young ladies , but my nimble fingers refused to be weighed down under the pressures of cross stitch and chain stitch and took a shape of their own. But what it did was contribute to my grey matter…
In college I worried about big things like how to sleep in class unnoticed or how to bunk classes and avoid bumping into the same professor the very same day. I also worried about clearing the boundary line.. No I wasn’t in cricket academy but haven’t you all heard about the 40 mark boundary line??

Work place gave me fewer worries as compared to my parents at that time. Each day I saw a new face on my screen saver, not any beautiful scenery but some prospective groom. I battled deadlines in office and very emotional deadlines at home. I wasn’t worried about not getting married but about my father’s deadline of getting married before he retires.. (phew parents!!) psst .. but that’s one of the few deadlines I did meet!!

Now as I play house, I battle with the following big worries, did I leave the tap running, I run back to double check on the gas connection, I m paranoid when the electricity goes (not scared of dark .. I m worried about the treasures I store in my refrigerator) and the works!!

All these worries have come with one big bonus … it has a very positive and visible influence on my gray matter… I have grown wiser… Coz all my grey hair do give a wiser dignified look ....

I’ve seen many troubles in my time, only half of which ever came true .. Mark Twain!!

And the memories Chug along

2010-04-08T17:47:00.001+05:30

Summers have this quality about them .. they tend to push you back in time making me wonder if the heat playing tricks on my mind..

The summer blossoms take me to my school quadrangle where we had two mighty Gulmohur trees or flames of the forest as they are commonly known. The way the tree would light up the drab surroundings . Since ours was a strict convent school, the petals of the gulmohur or rather the leaf like parts of the flower would be the substitute for long painted nails for us vanity starved girls.

The last day of the exams, the endless wait for the school bell to ring. The squeal when the bell goes off much to the exasperation of the teacher in charge and bounding down the stairs .. Feasting on pepsi colas or ice candies as they are known. Kala khatta golas and the works. ( ok please stop drooling now .. that was a note to self!!)

The train journeys t o Kerala .. 30 hours of nonstop fun and squabbles. The fights would start at the station itself., 6 of us and one tinkle double digest .. Bohat naa insaafi thi… I say.. Then the world wars were waged for the precious window seats.. It was the survival of the smartest.. Smartest cause he would even time his bathroom visits when the rest of the brood caught with their rare forty winks so as to not lose his window to the world..Hunger would be a constant companion.. With mothers wondering if the same could be repeated on a daily basis .. Trains have that magic about them..

Our grandparents’ homes with its open spaces was a welcome change for us city dwellers who are used to confined spaces.. the lush fields would bear testimony to endless games of cricket played without the fear of breaking the neighbor’s window panes. The never ending supply of mangoes and jackfruit and above all just nuzzling up to grandma and listening to her tales …

In the first week of May , the most sought after man would be the postman .. who would deliver our report cards .. Each time the gate opened we hoped it was him and the tension was done away with.

Time as they say flies and in the blink of an eye lid.. the most wonderful 2 months would be over and it would be time to pack our bags and come back home to books and all the routine. The return journey would see a more subdued bunch with bags full of goodies and lifetime worth of memories…

Breaking free!!

2010-04-06T16:56:00.003+05:30

The fan whirs away, doing just one favor to my universe, exhobirant electricity bills. Still it had a soothing sense on me. Almost felt like it is my best friend, cause don’t I do the same thing , I too just go about my task adding no value to the world around me ...

I have this whole sense of being no use to the world feeling. I know it will pass but it’s scary while it lasts. Everything from my job, to my writing, leaves me with a sense of vacuum.

Some days I am found brooding and asking myself, what is my purpose in this world?? (much to the chagrin of the better half, henceforth to be referred to as BH in this blog) I get no answers … and I don’t bother to ask BH the same for fear of that the already minuscule domestic duties he does, will be delegated to my fragile, overburdened shoulders.

My blog is now used synonymously with Rip van Winkle … remember none of his friends recognized him when he woke up from his deep slumber … my blog friends have mostly disappeared too …

However something has made me realize that there is no use wasting time brooding.. I need to get back to where the action is ..

There is a question that often plays at the back of my mind … does deep- mindspace need an image make over .. should I look beyond humor and satire? What do you guys think? Any suggestions??

I leave you with this wonderful poem by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

Entertainers Inc…

2010-03-19T13:03:00.002+05:30

A group of entertainers were in town. They had been talked about all and sundry. So to put to rest my curiosity I decided to make good use of my weekend and be a part of their show.

I entered the hall where they were performing, the dim lit room and the slow music seemed like the perfect evening.

The show began, the whole atmosphere changed. Zulu drums and cymbals playing, the audience was transported into enthralling world of the African jungles...

The first performer mimicked the lemur perfectly... chattering nonstop, baring his teeth. Poking fun at the audience by mimicking their mannerisms and dialogs. The audience was left asking for more…

The next was the python’s turn. It tried to move around the stage, launch itself into a jig. The dance jig being nothing more than a few head movements. Its two left and leaden feet and extraordinary full tummy didn’t seem to help. The failed dance though did have the audience in splits.

The next to join the party was the laughing hyena... This mean looking guy packed quite a punch. He just laughed, a weird persistent laugh. The audience at onset seemed a little dazed to react, but his laughter was infectious and soon it was crescendo, there was not a single soul in the crowd who didn’t laugh.

Standing in the corner was the giraffe, he just nodded in silence… no act from him.. he seemed a little lost among the others.. he just strutted around a couple of times on the stage and settled in one corner.

Then they all came together on the stage , each blending his act with the other. The audience was amazed how a small group of entertainers had brought alive the jungle with just a simple background and amazing voice modulation …

It’s amazing how few people high on drinks can transform a simple room into a jungle setting with their performance … (And as for me ( the audience) .. everyone likes free entertainment.. don’t we??)

Disclaimer: This post is a generalized one... Any resemblance to people I party with is Purely coincidental!!!

Retribution ...

2010-01-28T16:19:00.006+05:30

A 4 year old girl prayed, her eyes tightly shut, her hand firmly clasped, she lisped “Dear God, please keep me safe from all my fears and from Dogs”

Answered..

As she turned 10, her prayers were more specific, “God, Please let my P.T. teacher not notice my unpolished shoes, and please tell the local dogs, I really get scared of them.”

Answered as in unpolished shoes went unnoticed but my all-time favorite chatter .. gets me 5 rounds of the playground :P and the dogs didn’t bother me for a week ..

Teenage set in and so did Teen angst, “Dear God, please keep acne away from me. The dimpled hunk didn’t notice me despite all my attempts and previous prayers, please please keep Cupid ready next time he is around. Also protect me from the dogs …”

Answered the Dog part .. the hunk got transferred .. so can’t blame God right??

Then came engineering, “God, please cloud the teacher’s eyes, when he checks my glass traced Graphs. I just want a 40 god; I promise I won’t be greedy again!! The dogs near the Canteen eye me with suspicion.. Please tell them I am harmless”

Answered the Dog part and got 40 always.. no matter how well I wrote my exams!!

Workplace issues followed, “God, the module I worked on, let it go through smoothly, the appraisals are nearby. The PHB needs to notice me at least now .. else the peanut storage at home will need to be expanded… I heard the Dog lovers are on a look out for me .. please keep a watch!!”

Answered albeit the Dog part :P

And finally, “God please send my knight in shining armor … I am tired of the virtual guy search… and please please no more Dogs following me around … “

Answered … But this time something different happened … The God from Canine heaven was standing in as God was on leave, and in my prayers got muffled with a few barks..

… the sight I saw made me swoon with love and fear … My knight came riding for sure shining armor et al but he believes in the saying .. A dog is a man's best friend .. even if wife shivers n shrivels in its presence ... the price one pays for love .. humph!!

Divine .. err Canine retribution indeed!!

Spring Cleaning!!

2010-01-26T14:56:00.002+05:30

Layers of dust had gathered all around. Cobwebs had formed at every corner.
The once shining furniture was now replaced by something rusted and broken.
There was a time when this place was bustling with activity. Friends and sometimes passers by did drop by for an occasional dekko.
Now the path is deserted and the silence deafening…

She picked up the broom .. determined to clean up the grime and rust around.
The activity would begin again .. friends would drop by for occasional cup of tea and banter.. she had to keep the promise she had made.. This place would be alive again!!

After a big break in regular programming.. Mindspace is spring cleaned and ready to roll!!

Jackpot!!

2009-11-11T09:15:00.004+05:30

He slowly peaked into the dark cave. He flashed his lights to have a closer look. He just couldn’t believe what he just saw.

It was no ordinary cave. It was as if Alibaba’s cave had opened up for him without even saying “Open Sesame”. He would be a rich man now… the cave had opened up endless possibilities for him.

He could now invest in that plum piece of real estate he’d been eyeing and that mean machine too would be his. Then that diamond he had promised his wife on her birthday would be reality .. atleast there would no more be “Do you swat flies for a living ?” taunts

He decided to explore the cave further … he wanted to leave no stone unturned.

Thus ran the thoughts through my dentist’s mind as he looked at my teeth………….

As for me .. I am filing for Bankruptcy……………..

One step at a time …

2009-09-13T21:35:00.007+05:30

The path seemed familiar but why am I feeling lost? I try hard to find familiarity around me. I hesitate to reach out, like a sibling who had drifted away and lost touch.

I trace a line along the dust that has formed around, the dust almost mocking back at me for blatant neglect. The traced line however revealed a little bit of the world I had stored away in the deep abyss of my mind. The world which had tried to forget existed, the friends I had left behind. A lot of water had flown below the bridge , but there were many things worth going back for.Something was tugging at my heart to give this a chance again ...

I realize that this is a part of me I can’t let go. I need to live with it and nurture it. As I tread down the path again, I wonder what was stopping me from coming back. Was I scared of rejection or had I really wandered away aimlessly?

Will I be able to connect like before.. Only time will tell… But I am ready to take little steps again …

I slowly take baby steps back into my mindspace...

Honest Ramblings

2009-07-04T09:14:00.006+05:30

“This award is bestowed upon a fellow blogger whose blog’s content or design is, in the giver’s opinion, brilliant.” When accepting this auspicious award, you must write a post bragging about it, including the name of the misguided soul who thinks you deserve such acclaim, and link back to the said person so everyone knows she/he is real. Choose a minimum of seven (7) blogs that you find brilliant in content or design. Or improvise by including bloggers who have no idea who you are because you don’t have seven friends. Show the seven random victims’ names and links and leave a harassing comment informing them that they were prized with Honest Weblog. Well, there’s no prize, but they can keep the nifty icon. List at least ten (10) honest things about yourself. Then pass it on!!!

The master chef in blog world found it apt to present me this award. I suddenly woke up like Rip van Winkle to realize I had forgotten to give an acceptance speech. Voila here we come..

“First of all, I have always dreamed of this moment as a little girl (That’s not so long ago ok :P). In my moment of glory I would like to thank God (yeah he plays a big role), my parents, my readers, my friends (whom I literally have to beg to read my crap), the world around me which gets interesting by the day .. from the people in the meeting rooms to the Schummachers on the road .. without you all mindspace would be empty!!!!

Here are the confessions of an honest mind…( Mai gita pe haat rakh ke kassam kha leti par aap yahi puchenge ki gita kaun hai … so I skipped that step…. :D)

1) I procrastinate like procrastination is going out of fashion. On second thoughts I think I will take a vow to stop procrastinating …errr.. from tomorrow!!!

2) I am allergic to rude people. One rude encounter early in the morning and it sets the pace for a bad day!! Anybody out there knows about immunity to rudeness vaccine???

3) I talk a lot .. if yapping had Olympics .. I would have got India the gold!! But I don’t gossip.

4) I hate it when people call women with opinion as feminists!! Would you like it if I called you a sissy if you didn’t??

5) I thrive on my sarcasm, and it has gotten me into trouble too as many a times people don’t get it.

6) I get flustered when I know people are watching me work. I then goof up with simplest things like breaking an egg too!!

7) I am short tempered … but I cant get myself to scream at people .. it keeps simmering inside me!!

8) I am not a fan of gold jewellery … its always silver or oxidized stuff for me.. (hope all the mallu elders don’t ostracize me from our community for this confession)

9) I dream of leading a boho life.. doing something offbeat .. away from the madness of IT!!

10) Phew finish line… I believe its ok to lie if it doesn’t harm anyone!!! :D

Of rabbit holes and fairy tales!!

2009-06-10T19:07:00.002+05:30

She wandered along hoping to find some peaceful place to rest her tired feet. Suddenly she found herself falling into something that seemed like a rabbit hole, and in no time she found herself in a world so different from hers.

She looked in awe at the leafless trees, barren trees and snow capped mountains. A gust of cold wind almost knocked her over. She looked around for place to shelter herself till the wind ceased. Far ahead in the distance she saw an old dilapidated mansion. She treaded towards it as quickly as her tired legs could carry her.

Just as she reached the gates, the door of the mansion was thrown open and she was greeted by a group of ferocious looking men and women clothed in black from head to toe. Their eyes seemed to be gleaming with a wicked intent. Their laughter gave her goose bumps.
She wished she could convince them she had trespassed into their world by chance and meant no harm. She opened her mouth to speak but no sound came, her voice had locked itself in fear… Her eyes had begun to fill up …. What kind of a soup had she got herself into…

Suddenly she heard a booming voice ask … “ So Deepti , what are your views about the Functional Specification document!!” And all of a sudden the mansion transformed into a blur of ice cold conference rooms, black laptops … the locked voice into a yawn and the blur was due to sleepy watering eyes…
So now I don’t even need to explain to the few people who read me where I had disappeared ;)

As John Lennon Says… You may say I'm a dreamer....But I'm not the only one!! :)

Masks!!

2009-04-20T16:24:00.001+05:30

She sits with you in a group, flashes her brightest smiles, and cracks the most nonsensical jokes. You smile back, laugh at her jokes … tears roll down her eyes, you believe they were tears of joy..
Have you ever wondered if the bright smile someone flashes at you, hides a pain beyond imagination?

God really used his imagination when he created humans. Each one is so distinct with the way they express themselves. Some of them talk about it to all and sundry and get over with it. Some just sulk over it, leaving other's guessing what went wrong . Some of them store it in the far abyss of their heart and minds and just wear masks. Only that the masks tend to become so heavy that they eventually break the individual’s persona….

Clowns wear a face that's painted intentionally on them so they appear to be happy or sad. What kind of mask are you wearing today?”

Grass on the other side…….

2009-04-06T13:06:00.002+05:30

The people at Infosys think Wiproites have it better. Satyam folks believe its way better at Cognizant. The Tata Motors guys envy those at GM or Volkswagen. Symantec people believe McAfee are the chosen ones… The argument goes on!!!
Why do you think people complain that companies aren’t recruiting?

The grass on the side is always greener… the good looking guys and girls are always in the other company!!
But as the great thinker and philosopher Dilbert put it
“The world is full of attractive people whom you will never meet. Your only hope for romance is to lower your standards until co-workers look good!!!”

Really Proud!!

2009-03-20T12:31:00.000+05:30

They were both beaming with joy. He had scored 90 marks. Finally he had overcome all the obstacles and got to the top. He had been battling ridicule for so long, they were glad he finally got his due.
I just looked at them, wondering where I had failed them. No matter what I achieved, they didn’t seem to notice it anymore. May be I wasn’t trying hard enough…..

My parents’ reaction to reality show contestants’ marks is beyond my understanding. I don’t remember them reacting with so much pride even to my academic achievements (ok ok not that I gave them many chances ... but still!!)
As for me, let me quote Calvin “Reality continues to ruin my life." ;)

Striking a deal!!

2009-03-05T13:03:00.003+05:30

Too much of abuse seemed to have finally taken its toll. The poor guy finally snapped. “I am going on a strike”, he said. The employers tried their best to negotiate a deal, but to no avail. This time, they had tried his patience too far.
The employers are now sending him for a full paid holiday with spa treatment and all (yeah in recession time … lucky guy!!), so that he comes back rejuvenated and inspired to work again.

When the red flags went up in my room, I was wondering if this is an illusion due to overdose of Malayalam news channels at home and the red flags I get to see there. But this time it was for real… my good ol PC has really gone on a strike…. We have just sent it on a fully paid vacation to our vendor .. for spa treatment and massage included package :(

P.S: I decided I am not going to take the strike without a fight... so I blogged my sad tale in my lunch time ... no strike can stop my blog :P

Act 2

2009-02-13T23:44:00.000+05:30

The curtains are down on the play for the nth time. The director couldn’t believe they had come such a long way. The play had been based on common people and the writer’s experiences in general. A small idea which had germinated in the writer’s mind had traveled so far. The play had now traversed across the country and even crisscrossed the globe. It was an exhilarating feeling. So many different people met, each meeting just widening their well knit community, almost like a brotherhood.

There was so much hard work behind each performance, the hard work of the people who worked silently behind the scenes… the people the audience don’t see or applaud.

This blog turns 2 today. I can’t believe it has been only 2 years, it seems like ever. There are lots of people who became a part of my life from this world. Most of them whom I haven’t even met, but the bond is there and will be there even if this blog fades away. A special thank you to my friends Nikhil, Keshi, Mayz, Thomas, Mathew, Anju, Shantanu, Swats and Abhi. Thanks a ton for being there always!!!

How can I end this post without thanking a pal ( you know who you are), thanks for being the stingiest critic ( yeah very hard to please) and also making sure “This show goes on!!” without long breaks :D

And to all those who have been a part of this little journey of mine… gracias for bearing with all the good, bad and real ugly stuff I dished out!!

Also a very happy Valentine's day to all Cupid's chosen sons and daughters ;)

Do you have the answer??

2009-02-11T22:46:00.000+05:30

A crouched figure, fear written in its eyes looked all around. Danger seemed to lurk from all corners. The light shone brightly from the enemy side, blinding its vision. There seemed no route to escape, legs seemed rooted to the ground, paralyzed in fear, and no amount of cajoling seemed to work.

The lights moved closer and there were expletives flying in the air…. and then smoke, pandemonium and confusion reigned!!!!!!

So what’s the age old question….”Why did the chicken cross the road?” almost as eternal a question as “When will Deepti learn to cross the road properly?

P.S: I make a fool of myself each time i cross the road.. so much so that people actually stand across and watch the stand up routine I put forth for them :P

That unknown feeling

2009-02-09T23:22:00.000+05:30

Dear Diary,

It's weird...you know the end of something great is coming, but you want to hold on, just for one more second...just so it can hurt a little more.

That’s precisely been the thought running through my mind since yesterday and I have been actually running around like a headless chicken. Almost forcing people to keep me company, so that the thought doesn’t cross my mind again. I feel like I am holding onto the strings of a kite which is waiting to snap through my fingers. A kite which will break free and fly so far away, leaving me with just the broken string pieces and bruised fingers to call my own.

What scares me the most is whether I’ll be able to let go the string on my own and walk away with just pleasant memories of the kite. Or will those scars my fingers carry from the cuts the string gave me after breaking free on its own hurt so much that my eyes sting with unshed tears…. The vibes of the inevitable are strong … On second thoughts it isn’t an unknown feeling, it’s that feeling of helplessness ………….

Now let me recite to you one of my favorite poems by Edgar Guest; dear diary which mirror my feelings to perfection…

Myself

I have to live with myself, and so,

I want to be fit for myself to know;

I want to be able as days go by,

Always to look myself straight in the eye.

I don't want to stand with the setting sun

And hate myself for the things I've done.

I don't want to keep on a closet shelf

A lot of secrets about myself,

And fool myself as I come and go
Into thinking that nobody else will know

The kind of man I really am;

I don't want to dress myself up in sham.

I want to deserve all men's respect;

But here in this struggle for fame and pelf,
I want to be able to like myself.

I don't want to think as I come and go

That I'm for bluster and bluff and empty show.
I never can hide myself from me,

I see what others may never see,

I know what others may never know

I never can fool myself -- and so,

Whatever happens, I want to be

Self-respecting and conscience free.

P.S: Some times the grey clouds do loom over mindspace…. And the laughter seems to pale in its comparison!!!!!!

Missed Opportunities!!!

2009-01-27T22:34:00.000+05:30

I just lost a golden opportunity to give my career a boost. I am dejected and extremely angry that I didn’t take time out to develop those skills. With so much talk about pink slips and salary cuts, this had been a god send opportunity.

It all started when I got a call from the placement agency, which in these dark times seemed like the 10th wonder of the world. The representative in her most professional voice told me they had a few openings and it was high paying. As she listed out one job profile, my excitement knew no bounds. It was exactly the kind of boost I needed. With lots of responsibilities and a salary to die for!! The growth path was tremendous too!!

However when she listed down the qualifications and eligibility criteria, my heart sank like the Titanic. I switched off my phone for the entire day to mourn my great loss………

Here’s what the consultanat said to me:
1) Education (minimum eligibility): The lesser the better. Proficiency in handling fire arms like AK 47 and breaking a few bones.
2) Excellent financial skills: Including an ability to overstate the financial gains and make get finance in the form of hafta to the organization.
3) Oratory and public speaking skills
4) A flair to explore medical opportunities.. ( read drugs) and willingness to pursue real estate areas in confined spaces ….( did you know that’s a code word for jail??)

Pssst … there is a braking news ….actually Amar bhaiyya ( his secretary actually) had called me before he called Sanju … I lost the golden chance to serve you all … if only I had paid attention to enhancing my skill sets…………. :(

The Diagnosis

2009-01-12T16:18:00.000+05:30

She had been grappling with this problem from time immemorial, to be precise from the time she was 10 months old. Many treatments had been tried and many doctors consulted, but the ailment persisted. Even eating food was a problem. Her appetite seemed to vanish each time she sat down for a meal...

The problem got her into trouble everywhere she went. In school, she was always discriminated against, even made to stand outside the class for no fault of hers. The teachers overlooked her case; they even had no words of comfort to offer.
She tried very hard to overcome her troubles, but it seemed in vain. Her friends supported her, but she had this feeling a day would come when they would stop doing it too. She would have to fight her battles on her own.

After many years of struggle, there was a diagnosis to her condition. They called it ETD and the cause they presumed was genetic and in her case from the paternal side. This was a first step in her fight against her problem. Complete cure was still a research topic... she just prayed for a miracle......

The diagnosis was Excessive Talking Disorder (ETD).... wish this had been done when I was in school.. would have been spared of kneeling down on corridors!!!
Now I know why I suffer from poor appetite too, I talk more than I eat and by the time I go back to my food, everyone is done with eating and left the table or glaring at me to finish. How can a poor soul eat in such difficult conditions?

Treatment is on …One friend even suggested working in a silent movie to reduce the urge to talk… and he is gonna train me to communicate silently on the telephone too ( I have such caring friends) Any other suggestions are always welcome!!!!!!!!!!
P.S : The ETD researchers have invited me to give a “talk “ on the issues faced by people with ETD … any fellow sufferers know where to contact me … we can talk about it ;)

Deadly Silence!!!

2009-01-07T16:19:00.000+05:30

She looked at him, her sad eyes unable to hide the pain of him not responding to anything.
Days had stretched into weeks now; there had been no change in his situation. Nothing seemed to be working, neither the medicines nor the prayers. There were talks around her to replace him, how she wondered it was possible to sever someone from one’s life so easily, just because they can’t serve you anymore.

Slowly she tried to get acquainted to his replacement; but his loyal services over the years still seemed to haunt her. She hoped against hope that his heart would beat again. For the past few days, he had been just lying like a vegetable. She willed her folks to adhere by her decision to keep him alive for a few more days, even if it was through life support. She wanted him to have one last chance.

So my mother keeps on hoping for our dead landline phone to wake up since the past 15 days. Slowly getting accustomed to the cell phone, which she had resented with the intensity of Taliban fighting the US forces. Addicted to the tele phone, she used to chide me .. but the tables just turned ;) Now just one small beep from our friend the telephone will be the best music we have heard in years !!!!!

PS: And pray why is the telephone a “he”.. you may ask? Because it only listens what you got to say and throws it out through its other ear (literally), and never says anything in return!!!!!!!!!!! :D (ok now I can see the male brigade baying for my blood and my sistahs nodding their head vigorously in agreement ;) )

Time to move on!!

2008-12-31T18:41:00.001+05:30

She watched the sun go down. There was something powerful about this sunset. It only seemed to make her resolve stronger.
There had been several times when she had made this decision but something seemed to hold her back, some unknown force. She was being drawn into a different world, a world which existed only in her dreams, a fact she refused to accept. The smile she carried with her hid her insecurities from the world too. Nobody seemed to spot the cracks in the smile.

This year had been a year of hanging onto a past which refused to die down. Of dreaming up things, which would never come true. The last day of this year seemed to jolt her out or her reverie. She knew time was running out, decisions needed to be made. She had to move on. Moving on, two little world which have far reaching effects. The scars which would come back to hurt her in the unlikeliest moments. The mistakes that make a habit to haunt her and the sorrow of an unfulfilled dream that she would carry with her.

Rome wasn’t built in a day… goes the popular saying and nor do lives change in day. But one day at a time tiny changes creep in and in a year’s time we are not the same anymore.

Happy new year to all of you!!!

The past year has been good, bad and ugly for me and I just hope I can shed the ugly burden and move on to 2009. Just an attempt to leave the hurt here and move on!!!!!

Do you believe in Miracles??

2008-12-24T14:00:00.000+05:30

Two pairs of eyes sat staring at the screen. Taking in each piece of information thrown at them. Each time hoping to find what they were looking for; a face in crowd.

Their faces often clouded with disappointment and self doubt. Was this going to be another futile goose chase? They looked at her with anticipation, hoping that she would give them support in their time of need, but to no avail. But they were not ready to give up yet, after all life was about hoping. Their dream would come true, he would definitely come into their lives and everything would be alright again. All the questions of their prying neighbors would be definitely put to rest. They believed in miracles.

This is precisely the feeling I get each time I see my parents scout the matrimony sites for me!!! They keep hoping for a miracle... ;)

Snobbery…

2008-12-09T20:06:00.000+05:30

She could hear their muted whispers as she walked past them. How much she had changed over a matter of few days. Today she didn’t even bother to turn and smile at them, they said. Yet she continued walking, looking straight ahead.

Snob; that was the word they had used. It had hurt her too much. They hadn’t bothered to check with her about her misery. They had just drawn their conclusions. She didn’t bother to correct them, she believed in keeping her woes to herself. This too shall pass she knew, time would reveal the truth to all!!

Only if the people around her had realized that the new found snobbery was thanks to a real stiff neck developed over the weekend!!!

Of Ironies and Iron men!!

2008-12-03T18:46:00.000+05:30

He hurried to get dressed for work; he was running late which was unlike him. His roommates had already left and the room looked like it had been hit by a hurricane. He smiled as he remembered how they had teased each other over girlfriends and crushes at the club last evening.
He blushed as he stuffed his wallet, she did look pretty in that but he knew that smile would turn to a scowl if he forgot her birthday next month.

As the bus sped down the road, his colleagues talked about their plans for the upcoming holiday. He had planned to catch with the many movies he had missed. Slowly as they neared their destination, all talk in the bus turned to work. They focused on the day ahead.

The bus screeched to a halt, his day had begun. Then it was a just a non stop flurry of activity. By the look of it, it already seemed a long say in office.

Little did he know it would also be his last!!

A small tribute to all the brave men in uniform who walk into danger knowing what awaits them. Who have their dreams and aspirations at the back of their minds but give it all up for people they don’t know, but just know the fact that they are their country men, irrespective of the region they belonged to.

Tears will be shed, peace marches held, but that birthday card will always remain not sent!!

Kaleidoscope

2008-11-14T17:29:00.000+05:30

"The road of life twists and turns and no two directions are ever the same. Yet our lessons come from the journey, not the destination.".. Don williams Jr

I had been planning a vacation since quite some time. Finally I decided to pack my bags and leave to my home state , God's own country.....So come join me as I take you with me on our escapades...

There is a rule while going on vacation, you are not fully packed and done till you have actually boarded your train. The same goes with me too, last minute scrambling and rushing to stores for all the essentials , and still when I unpacked and looked for stuff, many of it had mysteriously disappeared.
We had booked tickets to Kerala by train, a long 32 hour journey. However we were in for a hearty surprise, the Indian railways keeping our drudgery in mind, had upgraded our train to make it a “Nature trail /Eco tourism” special. The main attractions were the mighty cokroaches. We had a field day observing their behavior in extremely cold (read AC) conditions. Few of my co-passengers though were more interested in the rat family nearby and their hourly squabbles over the fact that the cockroaches were stealing the thunder!! (Yeah, they have ego-trips too!!)

The first week whizzed past in a whirlwind of weddings and temple visits. The divinity being a little exasperated with me after a while though. I visited around more than half a dozen of them in a day and they were fed up with the same conversations I had with all of them (You see they had no variety to chit chat over high tea that day except me!!). The elderly relatives fed me till I had food coming out of my ears…complaining “You have lost weight.” (Yay so my weight concealing outfits were working… I rejoiced!!).

Then there was the dreaded M word (marriage for the uninitiated). From birds and bees to the tallest coconut trees, all wondered aloud why “good luck” was eluding me. The only end result of all this being a new “Zen –like” expression on my face and more temple visits!!

The next leg of the journey was a fun filled week of back packing across southern part of Kerala with a few friends. It was a slightly unplanned trip; we had just the places we wanted to visit in mind ….a la Anthony Bourdain… No Reservations!!

The first place we went to was the majestic Padmanabhapuram Palace. The beautiful sculptures and wood work had us spellbound. The palace is breathtakingly beautiful and well maintained. We had our funny moments though … when my friend innocently asked one unsuspecting guide .. “But why didn’t Marthanda Varma, the king get married? Wasn’t he an eligible bachelor?” The look on the guide’s face was priceless and the rest of us were almost ROTFL. (psst we did have some cheeky answers from another friend for above question …but since this a family blog… ;) )
Kovalam beach was a major disappointment though .And what do I say about the Veli tourist village .. the sculptures or whatever you can call them were just best left to wild imagination …

We left for Alleppey the next day. With no train tickets, and me being a first time back packer, I was shivering when the ticket collector asked us to get down at the next station. I am sure he wanted to throw us out, but looking at the mountains we were carrying in the name of luggage he didn’t bother to test his muscle strength. So we were stranded in no man’s land in Varkala for a while, with the locals eyeing us with looks they only reserved for aliens.
We stayed at a wonderful home stay option at Alleppey. The hosts provided us with a cosy room in their house and lovely meals. Trust me, the way we were devouring food, I am sure they would do a background check the next time around… “Starvation victims will not be entertained!!”
The backwater cruise in the lovely houseboat however made up for all the missed trains and crowded buses. It was like a trip to another world, a journey we all will never forget in a long time to come.

The next stop was at Kottayam. The plan was to visit the Kumarakom Bird sanctuary. Visit it we did, but the birds seemed to have gone on a wedding reception or a party, leaving behind just a few hens and crows. I am sure they didn’t get our letter announcing our arrival, else this wouldn’t have happened.

Our final pit stop was at Cochin, rather near Cochin, in a quaint city called Thripunithura. My pal A and his parents were our hosts. Hosts would be a rather formal way to put it, the reception they gave us was like family, though we were meeting them for the first time... It was like an instant connection, like we had shared some bond long ago. We visited the Thripunithura royal family at the Hill Palace and went on a wonderful ferry ride across all the islands in Cochin. We had so much fun, with the jokes aunty cracked, for in future whenever I hear the word “Adulteration” I will think of her.( ok that’s an inner circle joke.. cant explain). As I waved them good bye, I felt I was leaving my folks behind. :)

As our train chugged out of Ernakulam Town station towards Pune and we waved out to A, I suddenly felt something was about to change... and it has indeed.. for better or for worse!!
I had one of the best trips ever. Made lasting friendships, one tiny grouse though being a miffed friend .. still wondering what went wrong in a matter of 12 hours.. I wish I knew... :(

As this post is on a journey, can baggage be far behind, considering we had loads of it . I’ll end this with a quote I read in Anita Nair’s book “Mistress”

“Baggage I suppose .. he said softly. None of us is free of it, and yet if we were, we wouldn’t be who we are”

P.S: Two learning’s from the trip:
1) It is not necessary to just own a camera.. You should know to use it too!!! (Yeah all my pictures look like they have been shot by a 3 year old)

2) Malayalis are very disciplined people, don’t believe me … ok then check the disciplined queues at the Beverages Corporation outlets.. even army drills will be put to shame.

Acknowledgement : I thank "god" for the first pic ;) in the post

Path to Redemption!!

2008-11-09T21:31:00.000+05:30

She looked forlorn…. There was no reply even today. In the past she had brushed off his lack of response to being busy and distracted by truck loads of work. Her patience seemed to be wavering now and she had no idea whom to turn to.

Strange thoughts seem to pass through her head. Where had things gone wrong she wondered? Everything had seemed so hunky dory in the past... at least most of the time.
Everyone around her seemed so happy, what had she done wrong that things had taken such a grim turn.

So many mails had gone unanswered, so many conversations turning into monologues… She slowly nodded her head, picking herself to face another day in isolation. To be ignored, she thought is not a very nice place to be in!!

Why was God not returning her mails???
Had God really created a rule that sent all her mails to a special folder called “Trash”in his MS outlook … (the bane of being born in a tech savvy generation she rued …atleast there were no firewalls and rules at heaven.com earlier ;)!!)
But as these thoughts flitted through her head, she sat down to write God her next mail…
For she believed.. “Hope Is a Good Thing, Maybe the Best of Things, and No Good Thing Ever Dies. (Shawshank Redemption)

BA!!!

2008-10-27T08:49:00.000+05:30

There is this constant itch for a quick fix... she had this glazed look in her eyes which no one could read. Her mind was muddled. She wanted to go out to her world. Her world of distant friends who seemed to now be a part of her being. People she had never met in her life time.

Why is that drug addicts and computer aficionados are both called users?

I am on vacation folks and just 2 days without the internet and I am missing this blog world like crazy. I feel the need for BA (Bloggers Anonymous or rather Blogohholics Anonymous ;)). So long till my next fix folks ;)

Wish you all a very very happy Diwali!!

And I looked on with stars in my eyes.....

2008-10-21T12:00:00.000+05:30

He came, he performed and battled a thunderstorm. The world to which he belonged to,watched with awe as he grew from strength to strength. His blitzkreig left most of his opponents gasping for breath. But the respect he got from one and all , proved that all good things come in small packages :) .. He stood out not only for his game but for the standards he set for off field behaviour.

Fame is a bee; it has a song, it has a sting. Ah too, it has a wing! "
Emily Dickinson

And he didn't let fame touch him ... not even a wee bit!!
As the whole world looked at him, waiting for him to take one wrong step... A little girl looked at him with stars in her eyes , with absolute adoration ...

Not every promising player accomplishes as much as he promises. Tendulkar has. Let us celebrate that. His record will be broken. But his impact will last. (Courtesy : Cricinfo article)

Different.. Yet so similar

2008-10-14T23:59:00.000+05:30

They met by the quirk of fate at a hospital room. From that moment on, both their lives changed forever. They reveled in each other’s company, each watching the other as they took small steps towards their chosen fields. Helping each other as their steps faltered.

However as years passed, their relationship hit the adolescence roadblock. They argued on lengths, one thought that anything above waist length(hair ofcourse) was extremely short, while the other thought a bob was way too long!! They had loud debates on the advantages of talking softly ....

One believed that a penny saved was a penny well spent while the other believed every penny was worth spending.
The major concerns were regarding encroachments…of the wardrobe kind…. So, one had a firewall which blocked all the communication packets if it had the word “Clothes”. The “Tattoo” word was once uttered, what followed was a icy cold stare… which almost melted the Himalayas!!

Their rock wars were legendary, would have put even the gladiator to shame. It began with the advantages of adorning the bling n rocks in keeping with the neighborhood slogan of “Neighbor’s envy Owner’s pride” but ended with firework display … one with verbal missiles and the other relying on the tried and tested tear missiles ;)

So like the Coffee Bite ad says, the arguments continued!!!

But if one fine day, one of them sitting all alone at home, is hit by sudden burst of dreams going bust syndrome and breaks down in to a pool of them so called salt water. The other one comes back after a day of so called hectic social commitments (read navratri poojas), just glances at the supposedly scrubbed (to remove tear stains) face and asks, “Were you crying?” That’s when the phrase “bound by the umbilical cord” actually hits you with such a force that it takes your breath away!!

They are around to soothe your pains and to help you with homework and skin your hide when comic books mysteriously appear between textbooks And to say with a straight face “Your belt just walked past, if you walk faster, you might catch up….” :)
Mothers and daughters…. Alike but yet so different !!
P.S.: Please dont tell my mom i wrote this, for more than once she has told me if I didnt look so much like her, she would have been sure there was a mix up at the hospital!!

Those Little things….

2008-09-25T11:52:00.000+05:30

Sometimes it’s joy which you get from the unlikeliest things that put a genuine smile on your face. Midnight calls from unexpected quarters, mails and messages to know you are remembered and missed. Impromptu celebrations and even a meeting you forced upon someone ….
The candles were missing; you were made to do with blowing a match stick… (now isn’t that the sweetest way of not revealing your age). People would have rather slept off after a grueling day at work, but since you want to be indulged, they oblige. A chocolate cake never tasted so nice and the bun-maska –jam combo would win hands down to any gourmet dinner.

There were no frills, confetti or streamers, but a genuine effort to make my day and boy it did!!! Nothing in life comes for free, but some moments are truly priceless.

To all those who made my day special yesterday in their own little and not so little ways!! Thanks a ton!!

Flooded!!

2008-09-10T14:23:00.000+05:30

Last week the city I live in was inundated by rain for precisely 2 hours for one day. The chaos that followed after that was a testimony of the exemplary planning of our city planners. Stuck in traffic for 3 hours, my heart went out to the people in Bihar who had been going through this for days on end.

The flood and the fact that we were one of the few organizations working when whole of Maharashtra was celebrating Ganesh Chaturthi had put me in a real cranky mood the next day too. However I was unaware that another flood awaited me. But this was a flood that brought back the smile on my face.
I t was a flood of happiness. The joy that someone actually likes being your friend. In this real world of fickle friends, it’s nice to know someone right across the globe calls you a friend!!!

Keshi sent across two great gifts, which I am going to treasure for a real long time. And the best Part is that I get to share this gift and spread cheer too. Talk of having the cake and eating it too!!

So , here I display the awards I got from Keshi, (I know this acknowledgement is 2 weeks late !! )

Its the Blogging Friends Forever Award . And I pass this on to Mathew, Neena, Nikhil, Macadamia the nut, Thomas, G-man, Mayz , Keshi ( how can I forget you), Solitaire .

And the Brilliant Weblog award was also given to me by Keshi. It felt like a Pulitzer (I almost had an acceptance speech made up).Iwonderif I even really deserve this. I pass this on to some of the most brilliant bloggers around.

Neena, Silverine ( both her fantastic blogs), Karthik, Solitaire, Durba, Nikhil, Keshi , Mathew, Mayz , full2faltu.

This is all I ahve to say to you Keshi girl

"Something that has always puzzled me all my life is why, when I am in special need of help, the good deed is usually done by somebody on whom I have no claim. ~William Feather"

Great Words

2008-08-24T23:18:00.000+05:30

I have been tagged by two very special people from Blogville…

Thomas, the face which rules “Indians most wanted (character assassin)” charts in the blog world. His skills are known far and wide. No one dares to cross his path, for then the consequences are dangerous. I hope this description doesn’t make me one of his victims too …

And then by Neena. Her lucid writings never fail to touch a chord. She takes you down memory lane each time she pens a few lines.

Tag Rules

Jot down 5 of your favorite quotes from the various books you’ve read. If you don’t have the books with you now, googling (Wikiquotes and the like) can be used to find them. Tag five people and acknowledge the person who tagged you. ( okay I just copied the rules verbatim Thomas !!)

1) "Two roads diverged in a wood, and I --
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference." --Robert Frost

My all time favorite quote. It describes the person I am and strive to be …

2) Winning is most important. Everything is consequence of that -- Ayrton Senna

I love Formula 1. The speed is exhilarating and so are the races … the man I admire the most is Ayrton Senna. He lived in the fast lane in the literal sense!!
He always said God is my co-driver and I believe that’s true for each of us.

3) I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I’m not. Wanting to be someone else is waste of who you are ... Kurt Cobain

Kurt Cobain isn’t a role model, but somewhere these words ring so true.

4) "A true friend is someone who knows there's something wrong even when you have the biggest smile on your face."

Don’t know where I read this quote, but had it written down. So true about friends, they know when things are genuine and when the smile is plastic and your broken inside.

5) “People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world.”--Calvin

I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep everyone's expectations. – Calvin

Calvin and Hobbes, my stress buster. When the going gets tough, nothing motivates more than a simple comic strip.

I end this tag with a quote from a book, “A Thousand Splendid Suns”, one of the few books which made me value each gift I have. The value of the freedom I enjoy so unabashedly.
. . . she was leaving the world as a woman who had loved and been loved back. She was leaving it as a friend, a companion, a guardian. A mother. A person of consequence at last. (Hope I can leave the world just like that)

I tag Keshi , Mayz , Solitaire , Macadamia the nut, Karthik.

Sinister Seven!!

2008-08-17T11:09:00.000+05:30

The bus swerved along the dust path. She woke up with a sudden start and looked all around her. The rest of the passengers of the bus were fast asleep. The bumpy drive had killed her sleep and her thoughts veered to a handful of people who called themselves “Sinister Seven”!!

As the name suggests, they all had a shade of grey in their nature and whatever they gave the gang was just an extension of their personalities. The gang which came together as a quirk of destiny, but had formed such a notorious reputation, that even thinking of them sent shivers down people’s spines.

She thought of the gang leader, Bhai, they all called him with due respect. He was a philosopher dressed in the guise of an automobile geek. He religiously set the strategy of the gang, doling out his advice to all and sundry. The kingpin, his words and plans were always the Omertta for them all.

Bheja fry a.ka. Nerd. He was the operations guy for the gang. He always stood out among the otherwise rowdy gang for his mild nature. But that was just a camouflage for iron glove with which he handled the Bhai’s men!! Unknown to all, he nursed a passion for dance, and finally made world know of the same when he danced his heart out for the World Sinister Meet…

Icehead a.k.a Thanda… A weird name you would think, but that was how he was. Nothing in this world seemed to shake his resolve to not react to anything that even shook up mother earth. Everything had just one reaction, a smile. He was the go to man in extreme crisis, for his lack of emotions helped the gang think straight. However he could bring out extreme reactions from the rest with his impromptu musical rendition, given his talent to make up lyrics even for the most famous songs…

Hero a.ka. Chikna, the charmer in the whole gang. The huge female following the gang enjoyed (despite their wild image) was mostly his contribution. He just had to smile and the world was at his feet. He was the PR man for the gang, building a reputation for them among the other Sinister gangs.

Then there was Netaji or Leader, the name which was given to him, given his interest in the local college political scene. He was known far and wide for being a mediator par excellence. He had to his credit resolved many disputes for the gang. His negotiation skills had also won them many a contracts in the dark world. A true personality!!

DJ , they named him, for his great musical talent. His wisecracks had all of them in splits. He was the crisis man. He was a storehouse of trivia. The looked upto him for the details when micro planning was desired.

The guy who completed the gang, their global face. They called him Chota Bhai. The guy who kept their supply of arms and ammunition intact in times of drought and flood.
His main task was to keep the gang standard in line with other international gangs.

Together thy made up the fabric of a group which spread dread whenever they gathered together, their laughter too often mistaken for crack of thunder, such was the impact it gave to the outside world.

(However there was a catch; after revealing so much of insider information, she had to go underground with police protection. … Happy Rakshabandhan my dear bothers… This is just my way of saying thank you for everything and I am truly proud of what each one of you have turned into.. true gentlemen ….
Psst.. but please fess up to the world that all the weight I put on is because all the secrets I store for you!!! And yeah our war cry “Lukkhagiri Rulezzzzz”!!!)

Yearning…

2008-07-29T11:48:00.000+05:30

The passers-by went about their day,
Unaware that my world had just blown away,
I so wanted them all to pause and say
It is just a bad dream, the storm will pass by

Streaming sunlight filtered past my blinds,
Sometimes I wonder why it is welcomed by all mankind,
The sun rays sometimes crack my smiling mask,
Revealing, that to smile is such a daunting task.

The darkness spreads slowly across the skies,
Beneath the crimsons and the black, slowly I unravel my mask.
The silent tears can now roll down free,
In the dark, no one can bother me.

I slowly moved across to the window pane,
The drawn curtains reveal the pattering rain,
The raindrops wash my tear stained face,
But my heart still yearns and the gnawing pain remains….

Note: My attempt at something remotely poetic, written around 3 years back... Just found it in my archives and posted it . Please bear with the rhyme!!

And the argument continues!!

2008-07-25T22:22:00.000+05:30

“The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.”

I read the above quote somewhere and have been wondering how much truth the above statement holds. I have been having these small arguments with my devilish side of how untrue it is, but small doubts do linger…. does this hold true with women too?? Do they fall for the shine too??( By shine I mean the silver shine here ;-))

Wonder what you all think though!!!

Have a great weekend folks…

Irresistable 8

2008-07-21T22:54:00.000+05:30

8 , this number has been plaguing my thoughts ever since the editor of the Bower Times has me to do my doctoral research on the importance of the same.... Here are a few first hand observations on the same ....

8 Things I am Passionate about

Family

Music : From GnR to Indian Ocean, from Kishore to Pink floyd.. there is a rhythm for each moment...

Books

Friends

Being punctual

To keep my humor intact ..no matter how hard it is at times

Sports

Good food :)

8 things I want to do before I die

Drive my own SUV ... a Lexus Land Cruiser atleast ( whats the harm in dreaming !!)

Get a tattoo

Backpack to remote destinations and host a travel show

Learn to play the guitar and violin

Watch an Formula 1 race live

Overcome my fear of water and learn swimming

Be at peace with myself

Rein in my temper :)

8 things I say often

Oh my god

Yeah right

Kuch bhi..

Ishwara ( god in malayalam)

Ciao

What the hell... which in cases of extreme emotion metamorphosises to you know what ;)

Whatever... (like a sign of indifference)

Bitch ( out of extreme love or exasperation to my fellow species!!)

8 books I last read

The Namesake - Jhumpa Lahiri

The Kite Runner -Khaled Hosseini

The Goal - Eliyahu M. Goldratt

A Thousand Splendid suns - Khaled Hosseini

The Interpreter of Maladies - Jhumpa Lahiri

The Japanese wife - Kunal Basu

Difficult Daughters - Manju Kapur

A Beautiful Mind - Sylvia Nasar

8 songs which are my eternal favorites

Coming back to life - Pink Floyd

Sweet Child O Mine - GnR ( If only I could play the prelude flawlessly one day!!)
Country roads take me home - John Denver

Tujhse Naraaz nahi Zindagi - Masoom

Dil hai chotasa - Roja (I fell in love with A. R Rehman after hearing this song and from then on its been one love story that has stood the test of changing times)

Nahi Saamne - Taal
Jamaican Farewell - Harry Belafonte
Those were the days my friend - Mary Hopkins and Top of th world- Carpenters ( School memory... must say our choir teacher taught us some real cool songs back then!!)
Surya Kireedam - Devasuram ( One of my Favorite malayalam songs)
Yeh Jeevan hai - Piya ka ghar (I like all Kishore Kumar songs.. especially the sad ones but this number epitomises the essence of life .. )

I cheated on the last part of this tag and I am still miserable that so many of my fave songs have been left out ... :(

I tag: Anyone who hasnt done this tag yet!!

The Circus is in town…

2008-07-16T14:48:00.000+05:30

Every year the residents of the quaint town waited with great anticipation for this time of the year. For this was one of the few occasions where the whole town participated with full gusto. The colorful banners said it all; yes the Circus was in town!!!

What’s so unique about a circus a mere passer by would wonder? Didn’t they come to each town? Yes they did, but this circus was performed by the people of the town itself!!

The people honed their skills all year through, especially the ones doing the risk acts like trapeze. Those who handled the animals had an even tougher job, the tigers, lions and elephants were getting complacent by the day and no amount of cajoling was working.
However no one complained, they just looked forward to their act being watched and appreciated.

The D day finally dawned. It was a frenzy of activity with everyone getting ready for the show. Finally their efforts would be in full view.

The opening ceremony was a frenzy of beating of the drums and a grand parade. The Town Mayor along with his councilors declared the Circus open.

The jugglers walked in showcasing their skills with knifes, balls and a collection of items. Each one trying to outdo the other (as there was a rumor that the best juggler was to be awarded handsomely!!)

Then it was the turn of the lions. The ring master proudly presented his brood to the crowds. After all they were his trump cards, outshining their acts year after year. The crowds watched them with bated breath, but this year the lions were disappointing. Their lackluster display almost drawing boos from the audience.

To placate the crowds, in came the joker!! There was a thunderous applause. The funny man went about his antics. He went among the audience, made his funny gestures, and cracked the local jokes…. Even the mayor wasn’t spared.
The act seemed so natural to the audience, after all he had to just paint himself funny and make the crowds laugh. (Only if they knew, thought the man himself, smiling all the time comes with a price!!).

The trapeze artistes came by next. Their artistry and perfection left the audience spellbound. They were given a standing ovation.

The town mayor felicitated the ring master and had words of praise for the artistes.

The curtains were down on this year’s extravaganza. The show producer looked in glee at the bounty he had managed to collect. The greedy town mayor came in to collect his share as part of the taxes, the ground fees. The show producer, like every year was reluctant to part with a huge share and haggled with the ring master on sharing the booty.
What about the performers you might wonder, they just laugh a knowing laugh. At least their creativity had an audience… what more could they ask for!!

(Dedicated in loving memory of the annual circus we have in our part of town … we call it Appraisals!..

Disclaimer: Resemblance to any anyone alive is purely coincidental!!)

Dreamz Unlimited

2008-06-25T14:27:00.000+05:30

She was screaming her lungs out, so were the fellow tourists. The roller coaster was much more than she had bargained for. The adrenaline rush that it gave her was surely going to stay for a long time to come.

The Roller coaster, a little rickety and old, jostled its occupants around. The twists and turns it took, would give even the best crime writer a race for his money. The final descent was exhilarating to say the least. All the joy riders were shaken at the end of the ride but longed for more.

However a sudden honking startled them all, roller coasters don’t have horns do they?? Then where was this ear piercing sound coming from?

The dream had been shattered. The driver was still honking; today was the day all of them were practicing for the upcoming “Honking Olympics”. She was left wondering, but weren’t competing for “Roller Coaster” of the year award!!!. But an Olympic medal was not bad, however it came, she dreamed on …….

The inner turmoil!!!

2008-06-08T08:34:00.000+05:30

She held her quivering hands in order to stop them from dropping the glass. Parched lips, bloodshot eyes from lack of sleep… (was this the price I have to pay for my resolve she wondered.)
As the days dragged on, her self control seemed to slowly desert her. Prolonged abstinence had made day seem like a year. Her mind was giving right signals but the body seemed to be picking signals of its own…Maybe these were the withdrawal symptoms people talked about!!
Each day when it was time, her hand involuntarily reached out for her regular fix. It was only the meditation that she had learnt recently that got her through the wretched hour!!
The price she had paid was immense, so much of her precious time was lost she reminded her inner self!!

(She needed to train her mind to learn to love new things now …IPL was a thing of the past…But the craving for a daily dose seemed so strong that her hand invariably reached for the remote at 8 pm.. each day …)

Weird weirder weirdest!!!!

2008-06-04T21:21:00.000+05:30

First my apologies to my blog pals, I confess I have been highly irregular with my posts.
Was flooded with work , it was and is still raining deadlines .... There seems to be no respite on that front. And to top it all, been nursing a swollen ankle due to a real freaky accident.(now that's so like me!!!)
I had been tagged twice so many moons back by my blog sistah Macadamia. If I didn't do this tag now ( rather tags), I am sure she would even stop dropping by ....
Here we go....
The 1st tag was to give 5 time pass info about me which( I've never revealed on this blog!!!)

I talk very fast and talk a lot ( one of my friend even comments that me and silence are like chalk and cheese :( Sometimes my speech touches the speed of a Bullet train between Tokyo and Osaka, only when i see the blank expressions on the listener's face that I try to slow down :)
I can't watch horror movies... I try my best to pretend its all fake but the screen ghosts keep haunting me. ( wonder how I look into the mirror daily though :D)
Even if I try and keep my feelings to myself, my face betrays it all ... :( ( working on this one .. betrays me at the worst possible junctures in life you see)
I forgive but can't forget... cant help it but that's the way I am!!!
I suffer from partial amnesia... tend to forget names and directions easily and many other things too ( err now don't know if that's the sign of ageing !!)

Now lets get down to real business.. real quirky business.... (Macadamia asked me to list down 6 quirks too :) )

I love cars and enjoy ogling at them on the road... ( its only when the not so handsome drivers ogle back that I realize how much I was staring)
I read almost anything I can lay my hands on , which includes the newspaper used to wrap grocery, shampoo contents etc etc ...
As a kid, I used to love watching ants go about their business and even imagine what they must be sharing each time the ants passed one another ... (I would still do it, if only there were no time constraints)
I love to day dream .. I really think I would have given good competition to Mungerilal ( I am sure you remember him from Mungerilal ke Haseen Sapne on DD1)
I get put off by people with egos, of the size of Mount Everest, ... sorry I am not Edmund Hillary .. I cannot climb that mountain to please you :)
I really don't mind too much if people hurt me physically ( ok so that doesn't give you license to punch me) but I am distraught when people are rude. It tears me apart and takes me ages to get over rude people , always think its my fault they were rude!! :(

I am not tagging anyone .. most people I know have already done this .. Do feel free to pick it up if you like it :)

Om Tag -aaaya Namah

And he ruled her world!!!

2008-05-30T07:12:00.000+05:30

As she slowly dragged herself around, twisted ankle and all, she mulled about how her life was being governed by a mysterious force

It all started as the teens, deserted her, a strong force seemed to take over her life. Whatever she did, it seemed to guide her all along. Each decision in her life now depended on him. The unknown mystery man seemed to have a great influence over her being. She waited to catch a glimpse of him daily. At the bus stops, in the examination hall, near the laboratories and when she started working, every day at the work place.

And true to his knight in shining armor persona, he never disappointed her, each day he charmed her with his magnetic personality. So addictive was his presence, that she couldn’t envision a future sans him. She was sure he was head over heels in love with her too, else why would he go out of his way to charm her daily??

A sudden sound, jolted her out of her reverie. She had missed her bus again, despite being just 2 mins late, the dragging foot she cursed. But deep down in her heart she knew it was him, he had this effect on her….. he knew how to turn her world around, he really did…. Murphy!!!
Yes he is the man who rules each passing moment of my life .. :D

Birdwatching Escapades...

2008-05-07T11:21:00.000+05:30

The sun was just peeping out from the mountain when the group set out on a birdwatching trail. The lush greens beckoned them to a world unknown, a mystery that was just about to unravel ...

They had just moved ahead when someone from the group exclaimed" Hey thats a Malabar Pied hornbill." She grabbed the binoculors and looked up to see Mr Hornbill. But smart lad, he eluded her. Not to be done by, as the others in the group oohed and ahhed at him, she just exclaimed "Wow nice brown feathers!!!" only to be rebuked by a group member , not higher than her knee ( yes he was that young) ," Didi, hornbill is not brown" , ( uh oh, so what had she seen then).

Then someone spotted a Drona. She couldnt hide her excitement, she anticipated a bearded old man , Drona from Mahabharata. May be Drona had set up a retirement home in this deep forest, after all jungles were known to throw up surprises. But the excitement was shortlived, Drona was a little black feathered fellow ( err.. maybe a post retirement image makeover gone wrong , she comforted herself)

After the initial gaffes, she never commented on the feather colors or the kind of beaks. Just looked through the binocs and pretended to recognise the handsome hunks ( the feathered kind.. what were you people thinking!!!!) around.

Then suddenly her eyes shone with excitement as she saw a familiar and comforting sight. There she pointed, there goes "The great Indian Crow". She looked around waiting for applause... but there was just deafening silence... the group had just moved on....

(When the itenary in the trip guide had mentioned a half day of Birdwatching, she was thrilled to bits. After all, that was one of the few things she had mastered over time... But some one should have told her.. there is a category in birdwatching other than non feathered, two legged variety too :( )

Eight wonders of the world ...

2008-04-24T12:59:00.000+05:30

I have been tagged by Thomas of NASA fame :) ... Have been buried in work and with deadlines whizzing past my head, missed his deadline too( the 8 hours one)... And boy , his blogs take me back to my engineering days of mini projects and vivas and all the jazz ( not marks) which accompanied it
Rules
1. Each player starts with 8 random facts about themselves.
2. People who are tagged, write a blog post about their own 8 random things, and post these rules.
3. At the end of your post you need to tag 8 people and include their names.
4. If you fail to do this within eight hours, nothing will happen to you and you will die of boredom

So let me rack my brains..( not much to rack though) ....

I get very scared of canines ( cant call them dogs ... I already have the Blue Cross on my back for my lack of Comapssion). One particular childhood memory which left me scarred for life :( ... but I am trying to work on my phobia...
I can't swim to save my life.. in case of emergencies I might as well depend on the cute life guards ;)
I love the fact that I belong to real big family with truckloads of cousins... the joy they have brought into my life is irreplacable :)
What's in a name said Shakespeare, I take the Bard seriously and forget names and this habit has got me into real foot refusing to come out of the mouth situations..
I hate the color pink... absolutely ... ( not a feminist notion folks.. you would hate it too, if you had Pink salwar kameez as uniform for 4 years , four days a week in engineering college)
I dont like chocolate, the only sweet I like is Gulab jamun, which I can devour like no tomorrow ... ( hope the gym guy doesnt read my blogs .. else the crunches will be doubled tomorrow :( )
I am a Big Sachin Tendulkar fan ... and I take this chance to wish him "Happy birthday"!!!!!
I tend to give up very easily .. on people ,on things I like, on relationships .... thats one area I really need to work on :)

I pass this on to Alameen .

Klutz Klan!!!

2008-04-19T19:32:00.000+05:30

What do you call a person who cannot pass by pillars without greeting them with a bear hug? For whom the sharp edge where the wall meets the floor is the perfect spot to test the tenacity of the little toe. Someone who doesn’t need tattoo artists to create design on the thighs or calves, for sharp drawer edges do that job for free and with new patterns every two weeks.

She once even crashed into a wall in office, only to be told by the admin, “Please concentrate on testing our software, our walls are not human proof yet and we will let you know when you can start testing them” The admin even refused to acknowledge Mediclaim for her torn ligament, that amount they said had to be directed towards "Protect Walls from her" fund.

So when the honour was bestowed upon her, it hardly came as a surprise for people who knew her and had followed her achievements for many years.

Please put your hands together for the newly crowned President of the "Klutz Klan". The honour, they say, is given to the most innovative Klutz of the year. Her eyes were moist for it was after a lot of tough competition, and many failed attempts, that she had finally bagged the honour. The President in an a touching( rather creaking) acceptance speech, thanked all the wall edges, pillars, sharp edges for helping her in reaching this far and requested their support in the years ahead for continuing at this esteemed position.

(Psst ... on her way back home, Miss President flashed her Company Id /Swap card in front of the lift and waited for full 2 mins for it to open and even cursed the lift comapnies for poor maintenance... with this done, she is sure to remain President for a long long time to come ;) )

Battered , bruised and burnt …

2008-03-30T17:40:00.000+05:30

She slowly dragged her bruised frame. Each step taken was a reminder of the pain she was enduring. The scratches on her arms and feet, the torn shirt sleeves, each of them made her relive the torrid time she had been through.
Her burnt skin made her wince and turn away from the mirror.
Why oh lord, she cried aloud. Why did you single me out for this punishment?
Why hadn’t she let her good sense prevail!!!

How in the world could she have gone along on a trek to a dusty mountain on blazing hot summer after noon???

Trivia...

2008-03-30T16:32:00.000+05:30

I was tagged by blogarina "Silverine" to write some mindless trivia about myself :) ... Thanks Anjali .. ( hope its not too boring folks)
So here I come..

1.LAST MOVIE YOU SAW IN A THEATER:
Ok Ok I have this tendency of watching the best movies late and catching up with the crappy ones First day first show …
So the last movie I saw in Theatre “ Jodha Akbar” .. yes I can hear people chuckling.. but yes I did watch it ..

2. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING?
After Howard Roark bowled me over many Light years ago, there was one book which was suggested to me as Fountainhead*100 times.. yes your guess is right.
Atlas Shrugged –Ayn Rand.

3. FAVORITE BOARD GAME?
Scrabble and Monopoly

4. FAVORITE MAGAZINE?
Reader’s Digest is my all time favorite.. India today and The Week ( and of course Femina, Filmfare and all the jazz I get to read at the beauty parlor for free hehehhee)

5. FAVORITE SMELLS?
The smell of earth after the first rain ( ok Anjali don’t sue me for Plagiarism .. but I really love it too ) and the aroma of freshly brewing coffee…

6. FAVORITE SOUND?
When someone strums a guitar… just strumming will do.. no need of any great tune …

7. WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD?
When I see children neglecting the elderly (read old parents) at home. It turns me off. Also no matter what you do, everything seems to be going wrong feeling.

8. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE?
Do I really need to go to work Today? (Of course then good sense prevails.. who would pay my shopping bills.. )

9. FAVORITE FAST FOOD PLACE?
Marzorin, an amazing Sandwich place.. East street Pune J

10. FUTURE CHILD'S NAME?No clue… still single.. but if given complete freedom of choice ;) Ananya :D

11. FINISH THIS STATEMENT. "IF I HAD A LOT OF MONEY I’D...?
Just scrap my IT job… produce a Show on Travel and Living and travel all the cool places J J

12. DO YOU DRIVE FAST?
Pune roads with all its traffic jams allows cars and bikes to just crawl through…. (Though I must confess.. my speed Icon is Aryton Senna)

13. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL?
No

14. STORMS-COOL OR SCARY?
Cool as long as I am at home watching it …

15. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR?
Don’t have one yet so kinda twisting this one a little bit … The dream car would be some cool SUV , either a Ford Endevour or a Land cruiser for starters

16. FAVORITE DRINK?
Coffee .. anytime , anywhere …

17. FINISH THIS STATEMENT, "IF I HAD THE TIME I WOULD
work more for the children’s education scheme which I am a part of…

18. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS ON BROCCOLI?
Broccoli is ok in any form

19. IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR, WHAT WOULD BE YOUR CHOICE?Burgundy.. It suits my skin color too

20. NAME ALL THE DIFFERENT CITIES/TOWNS YOU HAVE LIVED IN.
Was born in Palakkad Kerala but then I have been a pakka Puneri after that, except for annual vacations to God’s own CountryJ

21. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
F1, football, cricket, Tennis.. ( in any order)

22. ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU.
Genuinely humorous and thoughtful

23. WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED?
I love Calvin , so line Calvin says “ hobbes I think there are monsters under my bed J”

24. WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE BORN AS YOURSELF AGAIN?
Yes!!!

25. MORNING PERSON, OR NIGHT OWL?
Morning person… night owl only to cram for exams J

26. OVER EASY, OR SUNNY SIDE UP?
Any way … it’s the easiest thing to make …

27. FAVORITE PLACE TO RELAX?
Any cosy nook with my books and music.. of course Kerala

28. FAVORITE PIE?
Not a major pie fan

29. FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
Vanilla!!!

30. OF ALL THE PEOPLE YOU TAGGED THIS TO, WHO'S MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND FIRST? Solitaire

And this tag goes to…
1) Solitaire
2) Nishant
3) Karthik

( I am currently Listening to Angels)

A new ride ahead

2008-03-15T19:19:00.000+05:30

Hi friends, I just conducted a practice session on my blog dedicated to Formula 1. If there are any fellow enthusiasts, do drive in to "Need for Speed".

Matters that weigh on my mind!!!

2008-03-15T18:43:00.000+05:30

Around a quarter century ago, a tiny, underweight being came into this world.(seems so long ago…. Whew!!!)
Her young mother, aghast at the bag of bones she carried around for so long, tried all the tricks in this world to make her baby’s plaster like skin glow with health.
Her efforts went in vain for good 20 years. Then the rewards came in leaps and pounds…
The underweight baby can now almost … I mean almost compete in the lowest weight category of Sumo wrestling... (Lowest aint that low ... in Sumo world by the way)

Now the young girl, (ok a quarter century old) , is blessed with a group of friends, for whom, any weight gain, even if it’s in grams is a greatest achievement. They tuck in plates of food piled so high, that you can’t see their face when they are walking around with their plates. They even shop at kid’s section in malls. She somehow learnt to live with them. Even smiling encouragingly (actually gnashing her teeth, thanking her stars she didn’t faint with shock and disbelief) when of exclaimed one day, “I really think I need to loose weight!!!”

Life plays cruel jokes. One fine day, the so called fashion gurus started campaigning for a noble cause. They called it The Size Zero Campaign, to save food on earth. The whole world (at least the female part of the world), joined hands with them in this noble cause.
She just looked on helplessly, unable to contribute to this great cause. So many people known to her lapped up this opportunity to give back to Mother Nature, by saving her plants and animals.

To add insult to injury, she suddenly noticed that even drinking plain water gets converted to fatty tissues which get deposited on her hip area. Now gym instructor also suspects, that drinking of water or eating by people surrounding her (friends, family, cubicle partners included) also causes this fat deposition. How else could the poor doctor explain, the fat deposition which is inversely proportional to food intake. ( latest on this ailment is that the poor gym guy has thrown his hat in the ring and taken to Sumo wrestling training)

By the way, friends, I’ll let you into a small secret, I have been working on a research project lately….
The effect of inhaling air on human weight, that’s my thesis topic. There is very strong proof that just breathing can cause weight gain in some human beings. The effects can be even more harmful than devouring four large Mac burgers and mountains of French fries. If anybody is facing such symptoms.. Please do get in touch with me!!!

So that’s all about the matters that weigh on my mind.. errrr.. Hips. ( running off to cajole the gym instructor from running off to Japan for the wrestling thing :) )

On a shopping spree!!!!

2008-02-20T13:40:00.000+05:30

The moment I saw my cell beeping, it struck me it was Friday and it was a friend calling me along for shopping…lets call her S. S was getting married in a few months time and yours truly being her best friend was assigned the task of accompany her for weekly trousseau shopping trips. So dutifully every week we would trudge along the malls looking for the most unique things for her. My friend calls me a fashion fossil… she thinks my fashion sense dates back to the time of the oldest dinosaurs; still she takes me along … maybe it is her sly way of giving me a lesson or two. It is said that opposites attract and so true it is in our case. I don’t take more than 10 minutes to shop for anything, I buy whatever I like first in the shop I go to J But that’s not the case with S., S scans every item in 10 shops and then either buys nothing at all or finds the eleventh shop.

Let me take you one of our small shopping excursions and hope you’ll enjoy it as much as I did

We enter a large accessories shop.

S: Show me a XY type of accessory.
Salesgirl: M’am, please have a look at this kind.
S: No I want the XY type.
Salesgirl: Yeh latest fashion hai ..
After 1 hour of relentless searching……
S: Nahi kuch pasand nahi aaya … (by this time we have looked at least 100 types)
Finally S likes a particular design, and I am asked to try it on…
S looks at me the way a scientist looks at a specimen who is not very pleased with the final results of an experiment. My heart sinks. This means we need to walk for another 5 kms which also means another new pair of footwear for me. I try to convince her that it looks good but she gives me a look as though I had committed blasphemy, and tells me that the look was out of fashion 10 years ago … (all for giving an opinion… and again I am reminded of my fossil status).

However all this extra scrutiny has it reverse effects too. Once while making me try out a particular item, the piece snapped. My friend and I hastily removed it, kept it back on the shelf and scooted out of the shop. We didn’t stop until we reached 2 kms away from the shop (I am sure we would have won India a medal or two at the Olympics.. whatay waste of hidden talent!!!). For a few weeks we judiciously avoided that street and if we saw anyone giving us more than a second glance, we would double check to make sure it wasn’t the sales boy from that shop J

The major gain from all these excursions was that, I lost all the excess flab I gained without spending a dime at the gym, walking is a good exercise. My wardrobe is overflowing too, cause whenever we went shopping for my friend, I always ended up buying more stuff than she did (I hate to disappoint the sales people you see!!!)

There is an incident without which I cannot end this post.
It was the season of sales, another friend of mine, a guy, lets call him X wanted to check one out. Yours truly was pulled along too. The shop had a good offer on trousers and X wanted to buy a few too.
X to Sales boy: I need trousers of size 44.
Sales boy: Sir aapka size 34 hoga,
X: Utna size toh mera 10th standard me tha ..
Me: Even I think it must be 34.
X: The waist sizes are different for men section. (Glares at me for the effect)
Me: ok… (While the whole scene was unfolding, I see a huge man ask for waist size 36)
X: Please give me size 44, else I’ll talk to your manager.
Sales boy (exasperated): Ok sir, as you wish.

Now my friend stubborn goes in with size 44 trousers of 3 shades to the changing room. In 2 minutes he comes out, a sheepish grin spread across his face, “It’s too loose”, he says, “I think I got confused between the shirt size and trouser waist”.
The sales guy just kept grinning with an “I told you so look” on his face. On my part, I was almost rolling on the floor laughing… (Fossils do know waist sizes at least!!)

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping!!!

This post got published as a guest post here too!!

You are One year old today!!!

2008-02-13T06:57:00.000+05:30

When I got you in to this world, you were the reflection of my being. For many days I kept you away from everybody, scared how they would treat you.
As you took your baby steps, I watched with bated breath how the world took to you. Initially I had to coerce people to appreciate you , to tell me that I was bringing you up just fine.
Slowly but steadily you grew on their popularity meter and then the appreciation was spontaneous.

First birthdays are always special and hope you have a great birthday tooo....
Happy Birthday Mindspace !!!

While I celebrate this milestone, how can I forget the initial days of struggle when I used to actually keep forcing my poor friends and cousins to read my blog and comment , even if they were not interested. To all the friends I made on Blogosphere, keep visiting :)

Quirky Tag :)

2008-02-12T20:18:00.001+05:30

I was tagged byMM and a quirky one at that :) Thanks MM.

The Rules:
- Link to the person that tagged you.
- Post the rules on your blog.
- Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself.
- Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
- Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their
website.

I lose hankies whenever I take them outside my house. No matter how much I resolve every new year that I wont lose them , I still do :( So Tissues only for me.

I cannot stand it when people get their grammar wrong in a sentence, and go ahead and correct them. This has landed me in a soup several times as many people dont take to corrections lightly.

I am paranoid of crossing crowded roads. I wait for the whole road to clear and then cross, even if it takes quite a bit of my time.

I keep washing my hands while cooking even if its not dirty. My mom thinks this is why I take almost double the time needed.

I am clueless about directions. No matter how many times I go to a place, if there are too many left or right turns, I can never remember my way around.

I sometimes get tensed for no apparent reason and keep fidgeting around and making it very obvious to people around me.

I now tag Silverine , Durba , Solitaire , Nishanth , Ravi , Alameen .

All in a day’s work

2008-01-08T16:09:00.000+05:30

"Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and
you're just a reflection of him?"

Some days I am surrounded by such a feeling of hopelessness that it begins to eat me up.
You can’t comprehend what you want from life. I feel I am drowning in my self created mess.
When you begin to go with the flow only to be stuck in a whirlpool and are sucked deep into it. And the mask of smiles seems too heavy to wear. I feel so helpless over certain issues, issues which have no closure.
Appalled by the deceit around me, often wondering why some people just have that power over me. Where people just use me when it’s needed and then in a fraction of a second, I am a complete stranger.
Sometimes I wonder why god made me so human, it would have been so wonderful not to feel at all.

Before my friends begin to panic, I assure you its just one of those days. As I weigh my blessings, these concerns just melt away. But still sometimes my heart rules over my head and I go back to thinking if only things had turned out to be different….

Its official now....

2007-11-19T10:59:00.000+05:30

Its official now ... Kimi is WDC 2007. The Mclaren appeal to FIA got rejected ... I hope next year on Mclaren learns to take defeats with more dignity ( you see Kimi is gonna be WDC2008 too hehehe) ...

Paging for …. Innocence

2007-11-14T13:01:00.000+05:30

The earth recently has seen the silent invasion of a new species. The invasion had been slow initially, but in the last 2-3 years the invasion has been growing in leaps and bounds.

Now let me enlighten you with the characteristics of this species and as is the norm lets start with the females.

The females in this species are extremely aware of the ever changing trends. Their vocabulary contains words like sexy, chic, up market, classy etc etc. They dress in the latest trends. Their color coordination in accessories would put even the top model to shame. Their hobbies include ramp walking, reality shows and television.

The males are more into gadgets and gizmos. Their conversations are peppered with swear words. Outdoor is not part of their environment. Their world revolves round graphics, gore and special effects.

A strong dislike for the non visual media (read books) is a common characteristic. So is the ability to exercise their vocal chords with relentless screams and yelps.

I am sure you must be wondering what this post is leading to… Welcome to the world of Junior Adults(JAs). They have almost invaded our space. Achievers in their species are aged between 2 to 10 years

But , they never enjoyed the wind blowing across their face, or built sand castles and had mud fights. They never played with dolls, they dolled up to be models with the perfect pouts. They don’t know that cricket and football are played on open grounds and not with the short cut keys and mouse.

For all of us innocent kids who dressed in whatever mom bought for us despite that trend being outdated by years . For whom birthday parties meant samosas, wafers and cake at home and not a theme party at Mc Donald’s. For all of us who fooled ( ok atleast tried to) fool mom that we were done with homework so that we could run out and play, here’s raising a toast to our Wonder Years.

“Nooo, I need a mini skirt”, the ear shattering scream across the mall almost made me drop the stuff I was carrying. The Junior Adult , aged 5 years old is on a shopping spree.
The JAs have arrived but where have all the kids gone?

Happy Children’s day to all

Peeping toms unite....

2007-10-29T16:41:00.000+05:30

As I enter my housing society, I suddenly have a sinking feeling that I am being stalked. Wherever I go, i feel few pairs of eyes piercing my back . I turn around to catch the stalker but alas i find no one around. I almost sound like the protagonist of Sidney Sheldon's "Tell me your dreams", but in reality this is not MPD( for people who must be wondering whether I have completely lost it :D )..

This is what I call OCN . It usually strikes when I am sprinting faster than P. T. Usha to catch my 9:30 Madras Mail office shuttle ( see I leave my house at 9:28, so you can just about imagine the scene). I am almost lunging for the finish line and lo, I am struck by a virulent attack of OCN. Unlike other viral infections, OCN usually begins with a pleasant smile so initial reactions are mild.

This is a conversation between me and OCN virus, yeah the virus talks too :D

OCN : So Deepti, you leave for work at this time daily?

Me: Yes Aunty,

OCN: So you are late today?

Me: Just a little (No, I am running the Mumbai Marathon next year, hence the sprint :( )

Before the attack becomes more intense, I smile my brightest smile and run off, knowing very well that this is only a temporary relief .

Scene 2:

My weekend had just begun, and my long suffering mother who secretly suspects I am turning aethist, coaxed me to atleast put my attendance at the nearby Ayyappa Temple.

Sadly, she doesnt know its not god i am againt but some of the viral attacks I am subjected to each time I go there, each being more vicious than the other.

OCN: How are you Mole? Visiting the temple after quite a few days?

Me: I am fine aunty ( big smile to avoid the questions).

OCN:How is work?

Me: Fine

OCN: So when are you getting married?

Me: Smile ( Actually gritting my teeth), No idea aunty, amma and acchan are looking out. ( And they also think they are running out of options)

OCN: I am looking forward to a sadhya ( wedding feast in malayalam) soon...

Me: ( I almost mumble the name of nearby mallu restaurant for sadhya) Silence...

I have never prayed as intently as that day and on many days when this strikes me ... God , why single me out for all this torture?

Now the incident that triggered this blog,

Last night one of my friends came down to borrow a book. I had just finished handing it to him , when he told looked at the top floor balconies and exclaimed " Deepti call the fire brigade"
startled I looked up, and to my horror, OCN had struck again. In the process of having a good look at my "male" friend , OCN had got tangled in the balcony grill. With great difficulty, the fire brigade rescued the poor soul. ( But I am sure she must be grinning at the breaking news she had at hand, isnt breaking news worth all the pain folks .. wink .. wink.. )

Long live OCN .. Overtly Curious Neighbours .. atleast they keep the fire brigade busy with their antics.. and I am seriously planning to run the marathon .. or maybe the obstacle race next Olympics as I practice daily .. dodging and running away from OCN :D

Kimi Rules!!!!

2007-10-24T16:06:00.000+05:30

The Formula 1 season has been one of the best I have seen.
To have a 3 way fight for the title is the stuff dreams are made of. The start of the race was the best Ferrari could have asked for. The moment Kimi edged out Lewis, he went into top gear and then there was no stopping him . Looks like Kimi's usual bad luck with the gearbox got transferred to Hamilton ( wasnt that really wicked of me.. but I am so delirious about his victory)...
The 3 pit stop strategy of Mclaren proved to be their undoing. Even the Ferrari haters would agree that ist their strategy and team work that got Kimi here. Alonso dug his own grave with his chronic "foot-in -the mouth" disease. Looks like its back to Renault for him. Massa.. boy you are some team player .. but please dont go the way Barrichello did .. you need to win too ...
But i feel for Lewis , he drove really well for a rookie and maybe with little more luck on his side I wouldnt have been writing this post. Better luck next time Lewis...
and to end the post, here's a quote from his post race conference

"People will probably try to make up more stories about me but I'm not going to change myself, I never did before and it's not going to happen in the future," Raikkonen added.
"I lead my life as I want and that's it."

2007-09-25T11:03:00.000+05:30

Chak De India

2007-09-04T11:36:00.000+05:30

I had almost forgotten I have my blog until one of my friends reminded me of my erratic posts(glad that people keep a tab) ... Last couple of month have been too hectic, loads of new things to learn and work on simultaneously...( who would have dreamed that oracle and UNIX have more compatibility issues than an average married couple :) )

Weekends just seem to fly past and before I know.. Lo and behold it’s Monday again... as the famous lines of the poem Leisure,
“What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare" :)

While on the topic of social networking, good o'le Orkut seems to be in news all the time and for all the wrong reasons too. People need to learn that it isn’t possible to monitor what every individual does, if not Orkut (which they threaten to ban daily) , the country's tech wizards will come with something else. What all will they ban??

There is one thing though that brings a real wide smile on my face these days, the sports scene in the country these days. Sania is in the form of her life. The hockey scene is picking up with India reaching the semi-finals of Asia cup. the cherry on the cake is the Nehru Cup win. For all the football fans, finally we could scream for our Indian team. The self belief shown by the footballers was heartening... hope this is a beginning of a new era (already dreaming of India making it to next Football World cup :) )

Hockey, the name itself floods me with a sense of deja vu. The school days hockey practices, playing in the slush on the school grounds, exemptions from exams .. the list is endless. Chak De India just took me back to the best days i spent in my alma mater. Its so wonderful to see people take hockey seriously now. Hope this is just the silver lining needed to improve the players' conditions and the playing conditions ( trust me the training camps are actually like refugee camps :) ). I am sure Dhyanchand must be smiling proudly in his grave too.
So here's to Indian hockey ... Chak De India...make us proud always :)

Walking sticks and Indian Presidents....

2007-06-22T18:35:00.000+05:30

After the fantastic weekend ... with the amazing race at Indi and Real winning La liga .. the week started on a bouyant note. Hamilton is actually improving with each race.. the way he matched up to Alonso's pressure was amazing ... for a change Kimi's engines lived till the end of the race and did not succumb to heart failures as it always does. The competition between Kimi and Massa was superb to say the least. As i write this , I am already dreaming about Silverstone.
Since i have a soft corner for Hamilton .. just hoping he triumphs on home turf.
The whole of this week has been so hectic that I dunno how the 5 days flew. More so because I was almost buried in work.
With the presidential polls looming over India.. I am dreaming of a day when Indian presidents wouldn't need someone to hold their hand in order to even walk ... ( remember Shankardayal Sharma ) .. our present nominee also isnt far behind .

The Sivaji fever has caught up to me tooo .. hope to watch the movie this weekend ...
Singning off the week that was :)

Somber Saturday

2007-06-18T10:57:00.000+05:30

Saturday started out as all normal weekends do .. on a lazy note ..
As my bro had his paper in the afternoon, the first half of the day till 11 had to be spent in forced silence ( he doesnt like any noise in the house when he is studying & for me its kinda difficult).
My cousins came in the evening and Deepak got me the amazing iriver X20 MP4 player from Dubai ... its actually my gift to my bro as he goes off to join his job in August at Schneider Electric.

The latter half of the day was just normal as i caught up on my reading ( reading Fontainhead again... cant seem to get enough of Howard Roark ... I hope God still makes guys with the same mould :D.. but even if he does, where are they? ). Missed the F1 qualifiers coz i read the schedule wrong :(
Saturday however ended on a somber note, there was a phone call at 1:30 on our landline. I dread late night calls, always get bad news. This call was no different, one of our family friends expired suddenly. Just got me thinking on how life changes in matter few minutes. So many times , we take people especially our loved ones for granted. We forget to tell them we care and when we want to.. its too late anyways ..

Return of the prodigy

2007-06-13T10:35:00.000+05:30

Being a huge Ferrari fan, the racing season has been quite a disappointment, but for the rise of Lewis Hamilton. I vouch for the fact that there is no harm in acknowledging genius even if it happens to be your competitor. His colleague, a certain Mr. Alonso though has some difficulty in accepting this fact. His insecurity shows in the form of his silly gaffes ( which I dont mind anyways :) ) . Kimi Riakonnen is blessed with good luck which seems to just increase each season ..and he does make it a point to share with his team too :) .

I miss Schumi but the competition just got tougher for Alonso from the least expected quarters ... just in his backyard.
Guess there is something between me and Spain... Nadal, Alonso and Barcelona to just name a few. Like the popular ad punchline says aptly "And the battle continues....."

2 Minutes of Fame

2007-05-22T18:13:00.000+05:30

At a recent celebrity wedding (read big fat), there was a media circus about a starlet claiming to be the groom's ex-wife. The media went into an overdrive about her suicide attempt and alleged drug addiction and the in-house doctors diagnosing a case of hallucinations.
However the alleged "Victim" got what she was seeking, her 2 minutes of fame (even if it was defaming) and glory. Who else would have given a second glance to Janhavi (see it wasn’t just 2 minutes of fame .. we still remember her name).

The numerous PILs filed these days have made a mockery of the judicial system. In a country where court cases stretch beyond the lives of victims , where a bomb blast trial takes so many years that the country has already witnessed a couple of bomb blasts at the same places , its a surprise our courts have time to even consider PILs on trivial issues.
All the litigants of the PILs are looking for are their 2 minutes of fame. Do they really care what Richard Gere actually does for AIDS patients. In case of the PILs against ART, it is a fact that what I perceive as beauty would be an eye sore for my neighbour, does that mean we file PILs and counter PILs against each other. India was a land which thrived on its differences. However it’s really scary to see the levels of intolerance these days.

Like the spoof on PILs on radio rightly says, does anybody ever think of filing a PIL against the government or politician who fall back on their promises or for people who starve.
I guess then, nobody would hound them for their sound bytes because they aren't filing PILs against someone famous, who would in turn guarantee them their "2 Minutes of Fame".

Metro... a way of life

2007-05-22T16:57:00.000+05:30

Due to my extraordinary( pun intended) past experiences with movies which are a collection of short stories which have some common thread, I had to be dragged to watch the movie, Metro.
However I am glad i was .There are very few movies which actually set you thinking about the rat race called life. Each day begins and ends almost like a reflection of a previous day without much thought given to anything.
In property ads we hear descriptions of the amenities and more amenities.We run to buy a flat with maximum amenities but without giving a thought about the little almost non existent time we have to enjoy them. The little time we have is spent mulling over the EMI rates which seem to be smiling back at us wickedly.
Its a trend to talk about spending "quality" time rather than "quantity" time with our loved ones. If only if it were that easy to define "quality".
We keep running the race and climbing the ladder and when we have decide we have reached the winning post or the top most rung of the ladder, the path which we traversed would have a trail of many things which we would we had waited and enjoyed.
However the pace of life has reached such a frenzy , that despite the thought of slowing down ... the EMIS and all the jazz jsut keep smiling and we just cant stop running.

2007-04-13T18:54:00.001+05:30

Youth for equality !!!!!!!!

2007-03-29T13:17:00.000+05:30

The morning news brought a big smile to my face today ( for a change) . The Supreme Court had brought about a Stay on the 27% reservation for OBC in all higher educational institutions.
Its a slap on the faces of our vote bank hungry politicians who will stoop to any level to keep themselves happy.
The quota controversy broke out almost simultaneously at the time the movie Rang De Basanti hit the theatres. This movie which motivated the youth to come forward and fight for their rights peacefully. The candle light vigils and silent protests sparked up a new fervour among the youth. Few students from AIMMs started the Youth for Equality, a group to protest against the 27 % reservations for Post graduate courses. What started out with few people turned into a mass movement almost bringing the Government machinery to its feet . Daily protests and hunger strikes only inspired more students to speak up. The politicians used force against them but the peaceful rallies continued. There were setbacks due to pressure put on the judiciary, however truth always prevails and today's judgment is a proof.
Hats off to "Youth for equality" ... we need more people like you....

Cricket Crazy

2007-03-28T16:32:00.000+05:30

My blog these days almost resembles a dormant volcano with posts errupting from my brain once in 2 months .
Reading the newspapers and watching the news these days has become a painful experience for most of cricket's ardent supporters. Each person worth his salt has some opinion to say about the team . The horrible losses we suffered against Bangladesh and SriLanka notwithstanding, its the postmortem being carried out which numbs the senses. Little children with hardly any achievement to boast of have media coverage for their slanderous digs at the cricketers.
However bad our state in cricket be, I personally believe we habe no right to burn people's effigies and deface people's photographs.
I wouldn't blame the local public, my question is to the media... "why do you give coverage to such events?" Does all this account for "Breaking news "( other than the Abhiash wedding ofcourse)
Why do we think so much with our heart, raise our sportstars, celebrities on a pedestal when they are doing well and then leave them in a lurch when their stars are not shining on them ...
More than anything else, lets learn to concentrate on real "Breaking News".
As for the cricketers the best option is to ignore them till they start performing consistently... ( but I really can't stop watching cricket :))....

Love Actually

2007-02-13T16:57:00.000+05:30

True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.- Erich Segal

This quote from the writer of the one of the most poignant love story may seem to be such an irony...however it holds so true in today's world.

As the whole debate (read war) between the believers and non- believers about the whole concept of Valentine's day rages on, the above quote may almost land me behind bars .
It is strange because when we have so many social issues to tackle we create such a hue and cry over a non-issue.

Love is a matter of personal choice, few people like public display of affection (PDA as they call it :) ) .. so why not let them celebrate while the others can always learn to ignore and carry on as though its just an ordinary day. Then it is also a case of haves and have nots. Those who are in love who bask in its glory and the so called unlucky ones who get depressed due to affection deficiency syndrome .
Its such a popular topic that people ( me included) dont mind writing about it though they have no clue themselves.

Looks like I am preaching now ... or is it St. Valentine trying to make me a believer ... I think i need to get my ears tested soon.